Lessons From The Book 📚 Stillness is the Key 🗝️

“Stillness and hard work must go together if you want to be successful”

“Stillness is an important trait that you must master if you want to be successful in the modern world. There are far too many things in our world today to distract you from your goals and ambitions. And, that's beside the regular crises that invade our personal and professional lives from time to time.”

“You have all the answers to the problems in your life, it's all buried within you. You only need to be still to find it.”

“John F. Kennedy did not always possess the quality of stillness. As a matter of fact, when he was a young man, the former American president was a troublemaker. He grew up in a family where “you don't get mad, you get even.” And he held onto that mantra for the most part of his life. He came into politics with absolutely no executive leadership experience, all his awesome leadership skills were learned in service. And, as you would guess, he failed several times.

But that same man was able to avoid a major nuclear war between America and the Soviets. The now popular “Cuban Missile War” would have escalated into something big that would claim the lives of over 70 million people had Kennedy not learned how to be still and let his mind guide his decisions.

Imagine trying to dismantle a grenade set for detonation in your family house. You have no prior experience or knowledge, and the lives of the people you love are at stake. You try, hoping you get it right, or you will all die. How fast will your mind race?

That's similar to Kennedy's situation, but he pulled it off. The nuclear war didn't happen, because he managed to strike an agreement with the USSR.

How did he do it? Several media reports of interviews with the people around him at the time, as well as information obtained from his personal journal, show that Kennedy had practiced the following aspects of mental stillness: patience, alternating confidence and humility, foresight and presence, empathy and unbending conviction, restraint and toughness, and quiet solitude combined with wise counsel. These are the qualities you will be learning in the chapters below. Let's dive in.”

“The mind is restless, Krishna, impetuous, self willed, hard to train: to master the mind seems as difficult as to master the mighty winds.”

The Bhagavad Gita

“Living in the presentwill make you a more focused and intentional person”

“Life — no matter how hard or beautiful, or sad or interesting — is a gift. But oftentimes, we fail to appreciate or acknowledge the gift of living, and instead, focus our minds on how he could fix the past or what design we could give to the future. And in so doing, we fail to live in the now, the present reality. Everyone of us is a victim of this. How many times have you climbed the podium to give a talk and, rather than focus on what you came to do, you find yourself wondering what your audience thinks about your dress or hairstyle. Can the ones in the front row smell your perfume? Do they think it smells nice? Oh that color on the dude sitting right over there reminds you of the first time you met your boyfriend. Eventually, you find yourself underperforming because you were too distracted.

How many times have you been in a phone conversation with someone, but find yourself toying with your keys, or something nearby? We all do that. But living in the moment with full awareness and concentration is the key to excellent living. You will begin to notice little things about people and your environment you ordinarily wouldn't. You'll become more productive, because all your energy will be channeled to what you do per time.”

“A daily commitment to intentionally live in thepresent will help you live an effective life.”

“As much as possible, put away environmental distractions like your cell phones, TV, social media, etc. Also put off mental distractions likeover thinking. Of course, all of these are good, but they become a distraction when they come between you and your goals. Living in the present doesn't literally mean to live in this moment — this second. It's broader than that. It means to appreciate your current reality and make the most of it; not dwelling in your past, or worrying about the future.

This act of stillness, if mastered, will change your approach to life, and therefore the results your life produces.”

“Putting away unimportant information will make you a better thinker”

“General Napoleon was famous for delaying the reply to letters he received in the mail. He was said to tell his secretary to wait for three weeks before replying to any correspondence. The General observed that most supposedly pressing issues sorted themselves before he even read them.

He was also known to have informed his soldiers never to wake him just to share a news — except “bad news” that demands urgent attention. The General did all these because he was a busy man, and adding information overload to busyness will not get him anywhere.”

“To think clearly, we must learn to differentiate between information that is useful, and that which is unnecessary.”

“We live in an age where information is easily accessible. Matter of fact, information is chasing you around. Think about the countless news outlets, social media briefs, the numerous e–books available on the internet. If you don't sieve the information that gets to you, you'd soon become mentally fatigued, and that will cripple your personal and professional effectiveness.

As much as possible, stay away from the news or social media. You can always revisit them on set hours of the day, or on particular days of the week. Just don't let them creep into your life. Also, try not to check your phone first thing in the morning. Far too many of us are in the habit of doing that. And you wonder why your day doesn't start off well.

When you stay away from information overload, you will be able to empty your mind and think clearly when you need to. That’s difficult when you have your mind racing over too much information.”

“You can learn to manage your emotions by leveraging on the art of personal journaling”

“Have you ever imagined what it would feel like to be handed a complete video recording of your life since you were born up until this present moment?

Sure, it will be fun and interesting to watch your life. But apart from the fun, you will be surprised at how you will, in that video, identify certain traits or areas of your life to improve upon. That may not naturally happen, because we're often too busy with activities we fail to really analyze our lives to see how we can get better.”

“Documenting your life and activities in a journal provides a rare opportunity for personal growth and development.”

“Apart from being a tool for documenting happenings around, a journal is also a place to vent your anger and all those negative emotions we often experience. This is so much better than unleashing them on people in the heat of the moment, only to later regret your actions.

Studies show that people who suffer mental ailments, or who experience chronic depression, tend to improve when they begin practicing personal journaling. Additionally, having a journal to record your experiences in turbulent times works so well to provide you with comfort and support. The life of the famous Anne Frank mirrors this so well. History shows that the teenage girl was able to survive the uncomfortable situation of hiding from the Nazis during the German war by documenting her life experiences in a little journal her parents got her when she was just thirteen. For her, the journal became a best friend; a close confidant and an ever present support. Many still benefit from the wisdom she learned and documented in those few short years of her life.”

“Whoever doesn't know it must learn and find by experience that 'a quiet conscience makes one strong!” - Anne Frank

“Learn from the wisdom of people who have gone ahead of you”

“You've heard that no man is an island — and it's true. If you want to live your true self, then you will have to learn how to seek wisdom. Socrates was known as the wisest man in ancient Athens, but his secret was the fact that he was intellectually humble. Rather than focus on what he knew, Socrates often forgot that he knew anything, which made him develop the habit of asking people questions. He became wise by humbling himself to learn from others.”

“If you want to gain more insight, then be humble enough to ask questions.”

“All religions and schools of thought agree on the significance of wisdom — naturally, they all have different definitions and views for it, but two things they agree on the most are:

• The need to seek wisdom

• The need to study and reflect

If you desire to be wise, develop the habit of studying. The fact that you're reading this now is proof that you're on the path to wisdom.

But, you should know that studying is not as important as the mind disposition with which you study. If you approach knowledge just to confirm your preexisting ideologies, you won't find wisdom. To be wise, you have to be willing to put aside that which you already know. Only by considering the multitude of things you're ignorant about will you find wisdom.

As you embark on the journey to finding wisdom, you will find confusion rather than clarity in the beginning, but that is only a part of the journey. If you're persistent enough, the light will break forth in your favor.

Did you know? Some studies show that birth order influences the choice of romantic partners for most people, i.e., first–borns tend to date first–borns, middle–borns date other middle–borns and so on.”

“Your character is as important to your success as hard work”

“We live in a world where everyone wants to be wealthy and successful. No doubt, every single one of us has the potential for greatness, and we will achieve our desires if we put in the work.

But, outward success will soon become your nightmare, if you don't have the personal fulfillment that comes from knowing that you're in control of your personal and career life. Many successful people don't find this personal fulfillment, despite the success and affluence they enjoy. They feel like they aren't in control of their lives. These people only act up in public, but in secret, their personal lives are suffering.

And it's all because they lack virtue, which is a key ingredient of personal fulfillment. Virtues are your values. The principles by which you run your life.”

“Your values will serve as a guide that keeps you on course through your voyage in life.”

“If you find yourself always yielding to temptations for example, it shows that you don't really have values you live by. You just live anyhow. And that's dangerous. Values will preserve your integrity. They will make you a consistent person (consistency of character is one thing that most people don't have), lastly your virtue preserves your success.

Ryan Holiday describes virtue as a sort of soul power you can draw on when you face challenges, stress or even scary situations. Great men and women from all walks of life who maintained high levels of excellence were guided by virtue they learned or created for themselves.

For example, the Emperor Marcus Aurelius was reported to have what he called “epithets for the self” among them are: Upright. Modest. Straightforward. Sane. Cooperative. These the Emperor kept all through his political career, and it shaped his life and success.

Do you have values you live by? Virtues that you'd rather die than betray? If you don't, it's not too late — or too early. So long as you're relating with humans, you need values to guide your soul.

Your values could be drawn from your family background, religious or cultural beliefs, or your personal convictions. Whatever the source is, just be sure you have some time alone to seriously think through and examine them before imbibing them. Examples of virtue are: Honesty. Courage. Strength. Kindness. Bravery. Faith. Giving.

Constantly remind yourself of your virtues. Practice them until they become second nature.”

“Paying attention to your body will make you more productive”

“When we speak of the elements of success, we hardly mention the body. We often speak well of how to use your mind and spirit to achieve the success and fulfilment that you desire, neglecting the last and equally vital member of that trinity — the body.

Your body is your unique earth suit. You won't get a new one, if you wear it out; and if it isn't in a good condition, you won't even have the motivation or strength to push through with your life goals.

It's important that we learn to care for our bodies. Be cautious of where you live, what you put in your body, what you allow into it, and how much stress — or rest — you give to it.

One powerful way to go about this is to cultivate the habit of saying “no”. Seriously, don't stake your body for anyone or anything. If something doesn't look like what you want, reject it without any fear.”

“It's easy to say “yes” because that's our default state but effective people are those who have learned to say “no” when they have to.”

“For example, you're stressed out from work and it’s finally time for you to go home. Suddenly, you get a call from an old client. He wants to offer you a gig, and he needs it done immediately. What will you do? Most people will sacrifice their resting time for the gig, especially if it's high paying. But, do you really value money above the rest your body needs — and deserves?

Taking a walk every day, or as often as you can in a week has incredible benefits. Apart from the popular health benefits of burning calories, and improving heart beats, taking regular walks will help you reduce built up stress.

It's also an amazing way to get new ideas for a project or something in your personal life. Try it tomorrow. Take a walk — and be present while you do so. You are almost guaranteed to find that your mind is cleared of negative emotions and thoughts.

Philosophers and writers like William Wordsworth, Soren Kierkegaard, Walt Whitman and Ulysses S. Grant understood and appreciated the incredible benefits of this activity. To make it easy for you, dedicate a particular time of the day for taking a walk. Do it consistently, and it will become a routine.”

Conclusion 

“Learn to be present. It's the first skill necessary to achieve stillness. And you can start right where you are. For the next few minutes, forget about your past or future. Take in the beauty of your environment, appreciate all that is around you, and be grateful for them. You can also be present when going about your daily activities. Do this by limiting distractions and giving your all to whatever it is you're doing.

Life becomes easier when you have routines. Don't just build a routine around walking, build routines around every single value in your life. Do you value calling your parents every week, for example? Why not set a particular day and time for it? If you do, you'll be amazed how your body will subconsciously remind you each time you forget. Not doing an activity regularly will get your mind and body confused at the exact time to remind you of it.

Don't get caught up in the endless race of modern life. If you do, you'll realize that you're only alive, not really living. Learn to have some time alone with yourself. Use the time to meditate, or just be still and practice being present. This will bring your mind, body and spirit in perfect harmony, and that's the condition for success and personal fulfillment.

Action Time 

Set a daily routine for stillness and meditation. Choose a time of the day that works for you and stick to it.”